I had the perfect Mother's Day yesterday. The kids all hopped into our bed to wake me up and I got lots of hugs and kisses and little baby bites. I also got some marigolds from Elliot that he had grown in his class and a bean plant as well. Adorable cards from the 2 older ones...it was really a great day.
Of course the kids are all really really amazing, and special. I got to thinking about what makes each of them just so. I guess I was thinking about when they were babies and I was holding onto them so tight because Archer, my last baby, turned 8 months on Saturday.
When Elliot was born, I was new to everything. Everything he did was documented and written in the proper place in his little baby book. Every milestone he hit was shouted from the roof tops. We were so smitten with him and he was so amazing because he was our first, our learning experience.
Brookelyn came along as our first baby girl. We lovingly dressed her in frilly dresses and I remember taking her when she was a few months old to the mall for a "mommy and me" excursion and buying her a dolly. So a new experience with our little girl. A little girl I never openly admitted to hoping for, but I was really happy to have just one little girl on my side.
Trae came along after very frustrating months of infertility and loss. He was by far our most awaited, prayed for baby. We were so happy to finally have another baby around. He was a perfect baby as well, not crying much and sleeping peacefully beside us. (pulling my hair;)) We were so in love and taking in every moment with this child we had prayed so long and hard for.
Now we've come to Archer, our final newborn baby. He is growing so fast. I am sad at how fast it all went, but I am so proud to see him learn new things and every time I get his gorgeous grin I melt. I am cherishing every detail because I know it will be the last time MY baby learns "mama" or "dada" and MY baby takes his first steps. The last time I would feel kicks in my belly and the last time I would see MY baby for the very first time.
I was feeling a little guilty, like I was somehow paying more attention to Archer because I know he will be our last. But then I remembered that I did the same with Trae because I had no idea if we'd have fertility issues again, or if we'd want to try again. Now I realize that we really cherished each and everyone of them as much as we could and I am just really happy to be their mom.