12.20.2008

*&%$@$#&*%$# Sigh.

Last night I was so frustrated. Jason worked later than he figured, which of course couldn't be helped and I am grateful for the hours. However, as all you moms know, when you're home all day and are anxiously watching the clock and awaiting some relief, a few extra hours is a big deal. By the time he got home, I was on the verge of tears, and ready to lash out, which I did big time...I ranted and raved, raved and ranted...to a very un-sympathetic ear. (in my mind anyway, but I was over tired and missed my nap and didn't sleep well...on top of my teething) I even screamed that I just wanted to get away from you and the kids and go to Walmart by MYSELF! Then I started to cry and said I hate feeling like this. I did get out to Walmart for swing batteries (they've been 1/2 dead for 3 days, which is making Archer not sleep well) and diapers. (size 2!) I bought myself a PedEgg and a Bender Ball, I saw both on infomercials when I still worked at the group home, so I've wanted them for awhile. On the way home, I was feeling bad and hoping nothing happened to me while I was gone because I'd wanted to get away, and some chick almost pulled out in front of me. If she had, there would have been no way I'd have been able to stop, and I was doing about 50. When I got back, I hugged and kissed them all. I did 20 minutes on the elliptical when I got back (we stayed over at my parents last night so they could finish up the shower) and crashed out on the couch. Archer slept 9 1/2 hours...which makes sense because he barely slept all day, unless I stood and pushed the swing back and forth for him. I'll be glad for next week when we can veg out at Jason's parents and there will be plenty of helping hands, a playdate, and massages. I am tired and overwhelmed and I just need a break, that's all.

9 comments:

shaunandhelen said...

Nice to know I'm not the only one who has those kind of days-- I know that Hannah has never, ever in her life slept for 9.5 hrs without waking up to eat (please tell me he woke up to eat) Curious how you know Aaron and Cassie, Cassie is Shaun's cousin.

Ben, Heather & kids said...

ahh, Amber, hang in there. When Ben drove semi over the rode, he'd be gone AT LEAST a week to a time, usually longer..being alone with 4 kids during the day is no picnic sometimes, then you add the nighttimes too. I remember having plenty of your "moments" too... then feeling horrible/guitly/embarassed, etc. afterwards.. but you're only human. IT DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BAD MOM/WIFE. Your just stressed...enjoy next week!! BIG HUG from one mom to another :)

Amber said...

Actually, he didn't get up to eat...Cassie left a comment that she read my blog, so now I read hers too. I don't "know" her persay...


Heather: I don't how you did that week after week. When he's gone 1 week I almost break down.

Shannon said...

hear ye, hear ye.

can't wait to meet you next week! i have this feeling we're long lost sisters or something...we seem to be a lot alike!

Tim and Melissa said...

I understand...110%. BUT be thankful that your husband has work! He's not doing it to make you miserable with the kids... But I do understand your frustration!

Sam said...

I am sorry I had company when you called this night...I FEEL AWFUL!

Heather said...

I think most of us have these kind of days...kids or no kids, so don't feel bad!! If you ever have another(very unlikely, I know...wink, wink...) give me a call....

Joe Heather & kids said...

Ugh, days like that are really rough. Glad you have a vacation/break coming up!

Amber said...

Melissa: It had nothing to do with Jason...I was just at that point. That's the privledge of being married to me...he gets to be my sounding board.

Sam...No worries;0)

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