11.20.2008

Looking Back.

I'm sitting here being emotional because I went back and read my blog from when I was awaiting Archers arrival and through his birth. Oh great, my playlist is playing "I Loved Her First." Anyway, I can't believe how tiny he was, and this post especially cracked me up!

I also found what I wrote the very day before Archer came interesting....read here.
Oh, and this post here, posted a mere 6 hours before we became a family of 6.

Seems like just yesterday, and an eternity. I am glad that I have this blog to go back and explore my thoughts and feeling and se what my kidos were up to at certain points in their lives.

I bought "Mommy Journals" for Elliot and Brookelyn when I was expecting her. They didn't have them when I had Trae, and I didn't write in them mich anyway. For some reason, I can write better and faster on a keyboard, so i've started another blog Letters From Mommy so that someday, my kids can read the entries.

I was just thinking the other day about how overwhelmed this mommy of 4 can be, and I mean I was so overwhelmed. Still loved the kids to death, but felt like I couln't continue dealing with all of them by myself. Then one day, I woke up and felt totally different about it. I realized that I was doing to much to soon for to many people. When I decided to let some things go a little, little things, not baths or feedings or anything like that, I felt so happy. The kids were making me laugh and it felt so good. I've always had an urgent outlook on life. I was always in a hurry whether I needed to be or not. So i've taken the time to slow down and realized that life happens whether or not you take the time to revel in it, so I figure there's no time like now to start paying close attention. That way when my kids are grown (in a heartbeat, it seems) I'll have vived memories of them. Maybe that's why I get into photography so much, because I am so afraid that I won't remember these moments. Ah well, sometimes I don't realize how deep I'll get until I've gone there...I guess you get what comes out!

Tis' good for me to reminisce.

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