9.16.2008

Mr. Defiant


He refused to get a towel and wipe it up at first, just gave me "the stare" but in the end did clean it up and was proud when he finished.

In hind sight I probably shouldn't have done a photo shoot since it may just encourage him, but in the grand scheme of things....

Here's the look I get when I scold him lately.

Trae sat on the floor sucking his drink into his mouth and spitting it on the floor....it took me a bit to catch on.



Poor Trae is having a bit of a hard time adjusting to his new role as big brother. He loves Archer to death until I start to nurse him, and then he gets upset and won't look at me or slaps at us. Of course he's not really hurting us and I hesitate to even post about this because I don't want people thinking he's being a beast, he really isn't. I have been trying to give him periods of undivided attention and hope that he'll realize soon that Archer will share mommy and he doesn't have to worry. He has a cold right now, and that may be part of it, but the little guy has had a lot of adjustment this week. He did awesome in meeting on Sunday, he sat on his chair almost the whole meeting, which is unusual for him...he usually sits on my lap. I hope he does as well at convention. I know he'll adjust to all of this in his own time, I just feel so guilty. Like, even though I am giving him plenty of attention, it still breaks my heart because as soon as he sees I have the baby, you can see his whole face drop and he gets sad and upset. Of course, Archer needs attention to, and I feel like if I put him in the bedroom to sleep (for his protection) and we are all out in the main area, that I am ignoring him. I obviously have to adjust also, and find the balance, and I know that they will both be okay. Elliot and Brookleyn are being a little more sassy and naughty through it all, and I am trying not to lose my temper and just explain that they are the example or remind them to act their age and that usually stops their behavior. The one other thing thrown in the mix is the fact that Archer really shouldn't be outside, so if the bigger kids go out, I can't go out with Trae, and then everyone stays in and gripes about not having anything to do. Whew, I didn't realize all that would come out. I guess it's a period of adjustment for the whole family, and we will make it through it together.

4 comments:

Cheri said...

we had a pretty hard time adjusting too, the first bit. i think i started feeling guilty before Liam was even born, because I knew it would be hard on elliot. it didn't help that he was used to having daycare kids around to play with...and suddenly he was having to entertain himself and mommy was occupied. bedtime was the absolute hardest, as elliot was used to snuggling me to get to sleep. now he has learned to waite his turn. all this w/ a bit of the "2s" thrown in. hard to believe its already been 2 months...things will get better!

Heather said...

Awww...yeah, I'm sure it's hard to become a big brother all of a sudden(we'll find out soon enuf)...I'm sure everyone will adjust fine after awhile. Good luck and see you soon!:-)

Brian, Erin, Connor & Ty said...

Breaks your heart doesn't it! They make you feel like you've totally betrayed them : P We had some of that w/ Connor, but am guessing it'll be more w/ Ty & probably very similar to your little guy since they're close in age. The good thing is that they DO forget eventually that they weren't the littlest one, but until then hang on Mommy! We've been doing the time out thing w/ Ty too & it is super cute how quickly they shape up!! We just set him in his room & tell him he can come out when he's ready to be nice. It doesn't even usually take a minute & he's toddling out w/ a totally new attitude & nods his head really big that he's ready to be nice. We'll keep you posted how we adjust once we finally have our little guy!!

papendorfs said...

Amber,

I think you are doing an amazing job and I was sitting only a few feet away at convention! I think T is doing awesome. You can tell he's really needing the mommy time and you did an amazing job balancing it. I think God gives special grace to parents because convention isn't about sitting and drinking it in.... it's more about gulps and sips. :-) The heart doesn't divide each time love is added. It multiplies.
Charla Papendorf

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